Quips and Quotes for July from our monthly flier
  Gusher: Oil of a sudden

  If you want to keep your teenager out of hot water, just put some dirty dishes in it.
   Experience teaches you to recognize a mistake when you've made it again.
   For those who want peace and quiet? A phoneless cord
   The trouble with living alone is that it's always your turn to do the dishes.
           Put Me In
  I love to sit and stare at a beautiful painting.  Not the modern kind.  But rather the realistic style,  The painting that makes sense to me. The kind I can put myself into.
  I love a beautiful rendition of a farm field with a gorgeous crop of corn and the sun shining down, while in the distance there's a little boy bobber fishing in a pond all by himself. Put me in that picture.
  Or maybe a fall setting, overcast skies with kids jumping into a pile of leaves while dad is sipping on a hot cup of coffee watching and leaning on his rake, looking totally content. Put me in that picture.
  And then there's the winter picture in a little town with snow falling, kids sledding, people shopping and dogs prancing -  all with that feel of total innocence.  Put me in that picture.
  Of course, lets not forget the summer picture at a cabin in the north woods overlooking the lake, watching the beautiful sunset, sitting by a campfire roasting marshmallows while dad is showing his grandkids how to skip rocks across the water. Oh yes, definitely put me in that picture.
  Whatever you do, don't get so caught up in the stresses of life that you pass up on the opportunity to say, "put me in."
  Search until you find that picture. That special picture.
   Admitting you were wrong is the same as saying you're wiser today that you were yesterday.
   Politicians straddle the fence, keep their fingers crossed, keep their fingers on the pulse of their constituents, point with pride, look to the future, keep both ears to the ground and think twice before saying nothing.
No wonder we're in such trouble.
   The man said to the counselor, "I have this awful feeling that everyone wants to take advantage of me."
"Relax," responded the counselor. "Everyone feels every so often that other people are trying to take advantage of them in some way."
"Thanks. How much do I owe you??"
The counselor replied, "How much have you got?"
   A laugh is simply a smile with a soundtrack while a smirk is a smile that doesn't work.
   Vegetarian : A salad citizen.
   Truth shouts...but sometimes it has a very small audience.
   The challenge is not so much earning our keep, but keeping our earnings.
   A lawyer is a rare breed of person who can prepare a 10,000 word document and call it a brief.
   There's only a slight difference between keeping your chin up and sticking your neck out - but it's a difference worth knowing.
   Customer: "I'm very sorry, waiter, but I only have enough money for the bill. I have nothing left for a tip."
Waiter: "let me add up that bill again sir."
   There are really only two kinds of people: those who listen to nobody, and those who listen to everybody.
Happy 4th of July
Have Fun
Be Safe!
   There are too many people in too many cars in too much of a hurry going too many directions to get nowhere for nothing.
   Never pick a quarrel - even when it's ripe.
   Many ambitions are nipped in the budget.
   Build a bridge, not a barrier. Make a friend, not a fuss. Find a cause, not a controversy. Be a cheerleader not a critic. Seek a solution, not a standoff.
   Home is a place where hearts are sure of each other
   Advice is something which we give by the bushel but take by the grain.